I love when people ask me questions about Islam. LOVE. IT. It means you’re showing an interest in who I am and what I believe instead of making assumptions. It gets me thinking about why I believe or do the things I do. I love it – keep them coming.
Over the years I’ve been asked some pretty adorable questions about wearing the hijab. I’m going to answer them for you in case you’re too embarrassed to ask. (If you want to know about why I wear it, you can read more here. )

The Luxy Sisters (http://www.luxyhair.com/pages/our-story) – I learned everything I know about hair from them. Even Muslimahs want to look fabulous.
Are you bald?
This is my absolute favourite. It has been asked so many times and it makes me laugh every time. No, m’dear. I’m not, there’s hair under there but it’s just all covered up. Muslim women will have all the same variation in hairstyles as your regular woman will. We do the long hair trends and short hair trends the ombre hair trends and the blonde streak trends.
So what do you do to your hair then?
Well! Okay this is my other favourite question. We’ll all do different things, depending on what’s comfortable. I like to tie my hair into a loose-ish bun. It keeps it all neat and out of the way and I don’t have to worry about a pony tail sticking out of the end of my hijab. I told one of the people who asked me if I was bald that the lump at the back of my head was just loose skin, and that’s why I wore a hijab. Oh dear. I’m sorry, girl. I was joking 😦
How come your hijab doesn’t fall off?
I wear a cotton cap underneath all my hijabs that keeps my hair in place. Not all women do this. I know my mum doesn’t – in fact, it makes her feel suffocated. I love them because it means I can play with the colours and match them up with the hijab and outfit. The cap keeps it all together for me.
I sort of explained how I wear my hijab here (I also told you about other weird things I do with my hijab, so have fun).
Have you ever pinned yourself with all dem pins?
Never ever! I’m not even that careful – it’s just really difficult to pin yourself when you can feel and sense what you’re doing. Because I wear a cotton cap, most of my pins sit in the cap. The main one that falls under my chin to hold it all together is just a safety pin. Mum always says I’m going to choke on a pin – I tend to hold them in my mouth while I’m pulling it all together, but I’m learning to be better with that.
Do you have sex with a hijab on?
I should stop saying any of these questions is my favourite, because they’re all great. No, no we don’t. Well maybe, I don’t know – it may be a kink for some people. Women wear hijab when they are in the presence of males who they’re not related to, namely, anyone who isn’t their brother or father or uncle or son or nephew or husband. We call these mahrams ( محرم), which basically translates to non-permissibles which refers to marriage – you can’t ever marry those people so you don’t have to cover up around them. Cousins don’t count – you cover up around them because you could actually marry them.
Thusly, you can infer that you don’t cover up around your husband so you don’t have sex in a hijab (remember, no sexual relationships before marriage or you will die).
Can I see your hair?
Are you a woman? Are you my mahram? Sure. Otherwise, I’m sorry. You’re going to have to marry me.
Do your hijabs have to match your outfits?
No, I’m just incredibly stylish.
How do you colour-match all your hijabs with your outfits so well?
See above. Also, I’m smart. My mum and I go to this suburb in Sydney called Cabramatta. It is filled with drugs and fabric stores. AMAZING fabric stores where I can buy a meter of gorgeous fabric for about $4. When I go, I buy 30 or 40 scarves. I get insanely good discounts. I can pick all the amazing colours in all the fabulous shades I want. Patterns that I could’ve never imagined and textures one could only dream of. Each hijab costs me about $6 or $7. There are hijab shops all over the place too where they sell weird and wonderful hijabs with lots of glitter and things. It’s amazing.
Where do you get all your hijab-friendly clothes?
Well, we get resourceful. Know a place that sells plus size, maxi dresses? Me too, and I’m probably their walking wardrobe. City Chic used to be great. Asos makes me happy. There are plenty of hijab fashion stores too. A really popular one is Inayah, which is pretty popular or global hijab fashion which is just so full of beautiful styles. Hijab couture is a thing.
So… like. When there’s a special event, what do you do with your hijab?
You can get hijab-styles. I’m not even kidding. You go to a special salon where the lady does cool things on your head. These ladies are all over Facebook, like this one. It’s pretty bloody amazing.
What if you just want to do your own fancysmanchy hijab?
Don’t worry, there are plenty of tutorials on YouTube. I mean, look at this one – it’s called ‘Hijab Tutorial Pretty Bow Turban – From My Ariana Grande Makeup Tutorial‘. There are hundreds of thousands of them. Be warned, lots of ‘brothers’ go onto these pages to tell the women what sluts they are and that they are helping create an Islamic community of miscreants. Just don’t read the comments. Smart videos like this prevent people from commenting. YAY.
Do you wash your hijabs?
Yes.
How do you wash your hijabs?
My washing machine really liked to eat my pretty hijabs. To prevent that, I now wash my hijabs in those little lingerie bags. Keeps ’em nice and happy and in one piece.
Are you allowed to wash and cut your hair?
Hell yeah, girlfriend.
Can I compliment your hijab?
Of course you can. Beats you trying to rip it off or spitting in my face because you think I’ll spontaneously explode!
Can I touch your hijab?
Are you a woman? Are you my mahram? Sure. Otherwise, I’m sorry. You’re going to have to marry me.
Is it offensive to try on a hijab?
Not at all! In fact, it’s quite fun for everyone! I was wanting to have a ‘try a hijab day’ anyway. Let me know if you’re interested.
I have another weird question. Can I ask it?
Yes, of course!
Even if it’s inappropriate?
Especially if it’s inappropriate! 😉
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I’ve always suspected that under a lot of hijabs are some rocking punk hair cuts and colours. This might be influenced by an add I saw ages ago for sexy lingerie that then got covered up by a – I want to say burka, but I’m not sure if that’s the right word.
Though I would really love a “try a hijab” day, I just always figured it’d be mildly offensive.
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I’ve known some people with the punkest hairstyles hiding under there. It’s pretty funny!!
I’ll let you know when we plan something – you can be part of a big group that does it. I don’t know anyone who would be offended. In fact, it would be quite adorable and a lot of fun!
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This is very informative and funny. Love it!
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Thank you!
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This is a very valuable sharing! Thanks a lot.
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Not a problem at all! Glad you enjoyed it 🙂
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I get the same questions every time, I find them very interesting :p
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I forgot to mention the one where they ask me if I have ears!! I love it 😀
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Wow, thank you for this. One of my clients insisted I write about the hijab and I have no effin clue about it, I’m intimidated to even start because I might say something ignorant and offensive. @_@ It’s so refreshing to read something like this because it eases my fears somewhat. I do think they’re pretty, but I need to know more if I have to write a style guide for it. Your blog is the most helpful I’ve come across yet!
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Wow, thank you for this. One of my clients insisted I write about the hijab and I have no effin clue about it, I’m intimidated to even start because I might say something ignorant and offensive. @_@ It’s so refreshing to read something like this because it eases my fears somewhat. I do think they’re pretty, but I need to know more if I have to write a style guide for it. Your blog is the most helpful I’ve come across yet!
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Wow a hijab style guide! Would love to read that! Happy to help – feel free to ask any questions at all 🙂
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That was an interesting article, thank you! I’ve been asking myself a lot of questions lately, due to the fact I began working in a highly multicultural environment. I even tried it on, although I’m a not Muslim and I know I would never wear it on a daily basis. But, superficially speaking, I’d love to wear it on a bad hair day 😉
Anyway, I grew up in a small city and before I moved to my current city five years ago (Montreal, Canada), I’ve never seen a veiled woman before. Actually, I’ve never talk to a veiled woman before last month, always to Muslim guys who don’t do Ramadan, prayors and stuff. Or that Syrian Christian guy that bash every girl with a veil. So, my point (finally) is that I couldn’t ask all these questions, not knowing if it was offensive or not. I’m very happy I found your article! So thank you again!!
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Joanna, that is so fantastic!!! I know how you feel – I moved to a much smaller city where most people had never met a Muslim, let alone one who wore a hijab. Some people had no idea that I was Muslim, despite the hijab, because it just never clicked.
I am so, so happy to hear that I’ve answered some questions for you. Let me know if you have any others!
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I would like to know how you perceive other girls, I mean, do you think we are impure because we sometimes like to have men’s attention, because we show hairs and skin? I’ve always wondered what muslim women (veiled or not) thought about christian/atheist women. I want your side of the story and the prejudices you’ve heard.
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Forgot to write: thank you 😛
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Hello! Thank you so much for your question. It’s a really good one. I previously wrote about why I wear a hijab (https://unveiledthought.com/2013/12/31/why-do-you-wear-hijab/) and discussed very briefly that it’s such a personal thing, that it’s not meant to be something that puts a hijabi or non-hijabi woman in competition. It’s not an indication of who has more piety or who is more modest.
Although I can’t speak for all Muslim women, I know that I, and everyone else I know who wears a hijab, feels the same way – a woman should be free to wear whatever it is she choose to wear, within the confines of acceptability (i.e unless you’re on a nude beach, I really don’t want to see your penis or vulva).
In the very same way that we passionately defend a woman’s right to cover herself as she choose, we believe that women should be free to show what they want as well.
Now, I think that girls who like men’s attention for reasons that stem to self-esteem issues shouldn’t be seeking validation from people who aren’t going to encourage and support them. It’s not because they’re undressed, but it’s because I believe that you teach people how they should treat you.
Women who are Christian, atheist, Jewish, and everything else in between are my sisters. I will defend and love and support these women in the same way I do my Muslim sisters.
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Hello i love this post, and some of those questions are quite interesting. I myself am christian who has been considering wearing hijab for a while now. I know the bible also says that women should cover their hair but i was wondering id muslim women would feel offended for a christian to be wearing hijab? I just love what it represents and would love to wear it. But im also afraid of what my family will think. That is a seperate issue though (albeit a big one as at 14 i live at home…) but itd be great if you knew how others would possibly feel about a christian hijabi, id hate to offend anyone.
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Hi, Hannah! Thank you so much for your comment – that was really kind of you. There’s absolutely no way that we would be offended if you wore a hijab. It’s there for anyone who feels a connection to wear it. We don’t own the hijab at all! 😛
I can completely understand. I think that the older you get, the more you realise that your beliefs and your parents beliefs may not be entirely the same. It’s one of those things that we learn to deal with and it definitely gets better over time. Maybe you could have a chat to your parents about the hijab and why you’re thinking about wearing one. Their response may surprise you! Let me know how it goes and if you have any further questions 🙂 All the best.
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I have been obsessed with hijabs for like forevermore and I didn’t know if it was okay to wear them. I keep telling my sister that I want to wear a hijab so bad!
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It’s totally okay! Anyone can wear it 😀
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The only purpose of hijab (not mentioning niqaab or burqa) is to dehumanize women and deprive them of their own identity, dignity and voice in the society. They walk as black ghosts without their own face and individuality, as if they didnt exist, mere shadows walking among men. Hijab degrades and humiliates women and is a symbol of them being property of men and of islam. Instead of islam teaching men to grow up and mature and control themselves, it blames women for men’s lusts and weaknesses making women awrah – filthy and punishing women for men’s problems…very sad.
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I’m not too sure you know what the difference between a Hijab, burqa and niqab is, because you talk about hijabi women walking around as black ghosts without a face. I wear a hijab, and my pretty little face is 100% visible. I own 4 black hijabs in my collection of about 100 scarves – all more brightly coloured than the next.
I take pride in wearing my hijab – note. My hijab. Not my father’s or my brother’s or my husband’s. It’s mine, my choice.
We are anything but shadows amongst men. Women have an equal role to play in Islam. Just because Islam is different to what you’ve grown up with, it doesn’t make it wrong. It makes it different.
Hijab is not degrading. In fact, it’s the opposite. Hijab is a sign of control and power for women. It says, I own my body. I will cover it how I wish. I will show parts of it to who I want and cover it up in the eyes of everyone else. I am not my thighs or my boobs. I am an individual capable of contributing beyond what my hair gives the world.
Further, you are mistaken when you say it’s a punishment for men’s weakness. Men ALSO have a hijab and are told to lower their gaze. Men are told to be respectful of women. They’re even told not to shake our hands and impinge on our comfort zones.
Wearing a hijab puts my body in my control. I don’t have to hope that a man isn’t looking up and down in a certain way. That’s not to say that this is what all men do.
Your problem is that you don’t realise that by telling me that my hijab is a tool of humiliation and control that you are in fact oppressing me more than any Muslim man ever could. Who are you to imply that I am incapable of assessing a hijab for myself and deciding it’s what works best for me?
The hijab existed before Islam and beyond Islam. Stop trying to force your ideals on to everyone else. No one told you that you have to wear it, so stop telling me to take mine off.
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no muslim woman would ever wear hijab if it wasnt for islamic manipulation. islam made the lives of women a living hell
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Actually, it didn’t. The only thing making the lives of Muslim women a living hell are the racists who attack us for simply existing and trying to live our lives.
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hmm lets examine it for ansecond shall we. if we go by cave men mentality. your men relatives would feel the need to control you thus islamic manipulation. restrict your freedom and your life will always be in a shadw of theirs etc.
on the other side all the non relative masculine population would like to be able to look at a random woman and her beauty. so doning attractive clothing and looking your best at all times my be due to the desire to exploit women and their sexuality in any walk of professional and social sphere.
while a hijab wearer be catering to her kinsmen , a western woman could be accused of catering to random men. and i am sure you willl find this accussation offensive. because we are individuals, while our choices might please a group of people, we made that choice because it appealed to us.
while you accuse others of being controlled ,dehumanized, manipulated in name of divinity. you could also be considered all of these things under the garb of equality and emancipation.
conclusion each to his own. we form our own decision based on our own judgements, but casting stones while residing in glass houses is just a waste of time
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You forgot the HUGE unequality in the western culture?! Hint: MUCH MUCH more women act eye-candy for men than men act eye-candy for women. In the western context the Hijab can be emancipation from that specific, current western unequality! You´ll always have to consider the context. One muslim Hijabi woman can be opressed by the pressure from her family and relatives to wear the Hijab and to act a certain, very modest way AND (acually!) more equal to men than MANY western women in a (visual) way.
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Can i wear hijab even im not a muslim?Hm i mean, i just want to post on my facebook, but i thought it might be an offensive or dishonor. Answer please..
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Of course you can! It would not be offensive at all. I’d love to see a picture!
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Hello again, and thank you so much for such a kind response! I have yet to work up the nerve to ask my mom if I can wear it. I briefly brought up hijabs in general in a discussion not long ago with her, taking the side of it being a posistive and liberating thing for women. My mother though is a feminist (as am i but we do have different takes on things) and believes that although hijab is the womans’ choice, it is still a symbol of ownership and oppression by men. That was a let down…but I have someone in my life currently who is what girls would call their “boyfriend”, who is an atheist. Typically not the best coupling, but it happens. But the most amazing thing happened when i discussed me wearing a hijab with him: he was completely okay with it, and even said that if we were to ever marry, even though its not his belief, he would allow me to wear a head covering at the wedding. I was terrified to tell him, but im so glad i did because he was more supportive than i expected. Gives me hope. Once again, thank you very much for your response before, I absolutely adore your blog.
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Hello again, my dear! I’m glad that you were able to have the starts of conversations with the loved ones in your life. I’m sure it will get easier as time goes on.
I definitely think wearing or not wearing a hijab should be a choice you’re free to make, no matter what a family member or loved one thinks. Always feel empowered to look the way you’re comfortable to look!
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Hannah, have you explored other types of headcoverings? I am a Christian woman who loves the hijab and the gele, and the tichel and the tignon- just covering my head with pretty scarves, period. Interestingly, I don’t prefer to wear hats, which are really big in my culture; scarves- not so much. I found this article because I wanted to know if it was offensive to Muslims if I were to wear a hijab. We don’t have a huge community where I live, but I don’t want to be disrespectful to anyone.
Here is why I am responding to your comment with my question: you mention that you are 14 years old. I think that perhaps your family may not object as strongly as you think- they may consider that it’s just a fad that will pass and be happy to allow you to try it. Suppose you eased them into it with another style of headscarf that is less well defined, like a bandana, or a tichel, and work your way over to the hijab? Perhaps this could start a conversation with your family and show them that you are serious about dressing more modestly.to take anything away
I hope something I’ve said here could assist you on your journey.
Amne, I appreciate this Q&A and thank you for it. I’m not trying to take anything away from the hijab; I am attempting to help a little sister to find her way to herself. Thank you for the opportunity and the encouragement. I’m off to learn how to tie my hijab!
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Hi Laurel! Thank you so much for this – it’s some fabulous advice. We’re all here to support each other 😀 I’d love to know how you go with your hijab tying!
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I don´t know if you still have these problems with your mother. But I just awnted to say that I´m a non-muslim woman, who consider myself a Real Hardcore Feminist! (LOL!) and who wear a hood-type headscarf to cover my own hair as part of my everyday clothing style! I also cover most of my own body. It´s Really Empowering to be able to choose for yourself who gets to see your hair and your body and when. It´s actually opressing towards women to say that a cloth symbolize what female-opressing MEN says it symbolizes! That´s a food for thought!
I know many people have this negative attitude towards women veiling their hair and bodies, saying it symbolizes what some men has decided it symbolizes TO THEM -NO MATTER what the women wearing it THEMSELVES feel it symbolizes! But you´re smart enough to see that cause of that whole negative attitude that opression of women continues?!
The best thing you could do is what you Love to do and what you belive in! Cause then you are true to yourself!
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Couldn’t have said it better myself!
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I had a friend in high school who started to wear a veil during the last few months of school before she got married. She was a typical American girl and this wasn’t her family’s tradition. I thought they were pretty and I want to wear one too, but didn’t because I thought it would be inappropriate. I started to use a picture on Facebook of a girl wearing hijab and I got some replies that people thought it was me and wrote to me in Arabic. (I assume they were friendly greetings). After this, I was mildly surprised I didn’t get any nasty replies from strangers. To tell the truth, that is another reason I’m chicken because I don’t want someone attacking me for how I’m dressed. Well, thats my one question, what would most Muslims think of non- Muslim wearing hijab?
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Hi Michelle. Thank you for your message and for sharing your experiences. I’m glad that you weren’t harassed by strangers.
Wearing a hijab, or a scarf on your head is definitely not something we Muslims own. We are more than happy to share with the rest of the world! If it’s something you want to do, whether it’s for a day or a year or the rest of your life, you should go for it! If you do go ahead and wear it, I’d love to hear your experiences!
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I have a Hijab question. I ride my bike to work and wear a pony tail under my helmet. A couple of days ago, when I got to work, I was headed to the bathroom and pulled out my ponytail and was shaking my hair out right as I walked by a woman in a Hijab. There was this brief flash across her face of shock, offense, hurt, and I don’t know why. At the time, I thought that maybe this seemed really immodest, but after reading your excellent article, I suspect that she may have felt I was mocking her in some way, which I wasn’t. Do you have any idea why what I did was offensive? I am certainly not going to change how I wear my hair, but I am willing to be sensitive of others feelings to the best of my abilities.
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Hi Miriam! Thanks for your question. I’m not too sure about what happened with this situation. It’s very unlikely that this girl was offended by your hair or the fact that you had pulled it out of a pony tail. Is it possible that you were shaking your hair out really close to her? Maybe she thought you guys were going to bump into each other? It’s also possible that she was thinking about something else and when she looked up she didn’t expect to see you?
I’m really not sure. That’s a difficult one. I don’t think there was anything that you did that was offensive at all. Feel free to wear your hair however you please! On the off chance that she was offended – that’s totally her problem!
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Good to know. I am at a college campus and many students here wear Hijabs. I have never thought much of it except that they look nice and warm on cold days, and sometimes they are really pretty. Then after that I began to worry that somehow I was being insensitive. I won’t worry any more. Thanks so much for your open and honest answers.
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Hi there! I have a question, and I have seen you field a few variations of it already, but I would feel terribly guilty if my lack of clarification caused offense to someone so please forgive me for wasting your time hahaha. I am non-anything religious person who is interested in wearing a hijab for the purposes of modesty (and sun protection, but that is just a bonus), would that be terribly offensive to anyone who wears them for religious reasons? No matter the answer, I just wanted to make sure to thank you for writing this wonderful article 🙂
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Hi Sara! Thanks so much for your message. You never have to worry about sending me silly questions or even repetitive questions! Everyone has slightly different questions to ask. There’s nothing at all offensive about you wearing a hijab. Really, wearing a hijab often involves considerations that go beyond just religion – modesty, identity etc. If you feel that wearing a hijab resonates with you, then feel empowered to wear one! I do, however, ask that you are mindful of your conduct while wearing a hijab. Wider society associates a hijab with Muslim women and Islam. In wearing a hijab, you become an unofficial representative of the Islamic community and people will associate your actions with Muslims. That’s not to say you have to be perfect at all! Just sort of keep in mind that you’re likely to be seen to be associate with Islam.
All the very best with whatever you choose to do. I would love to hear about your experiences if you end up wearing a hijab!
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In the same vein, I am a Christian woman. I do however feel a calling toward a certain level of modesty and there is a basis even in the Bible for covering ones hair as a mark of modesty. I was concerned it would be offensive as well but I do feel that the hijab is a wonderful way to demonstrate that modesty. With your comments regarding mindfulness, would or should, in your opinion, it be problematic that one say… wear tank tops for example, while still covering ones head? I hope this makes sense, it made sense in my head, and i want to thank you for being so open to questions that many im sure have wondered about but were unsure who or how to ask
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Hi Aideen! Thanks for your question. I’m really amazed by how many women feel that covering their hair is the right way to go. I think the same sentiment I shared with the others works here – dress in the way that makes you most comfortable and forget about what anyone else thinks.
I mean sure, if you wore a more turban-style-hijab, it may better match your tank top – but whatever! People will cover their heads for so many different reasons. There’s no need to explain each individual case for everyone.
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Thank you so much for this post! I’ve always been worried about whether or not I could compliment on a woman’s hijab! Some are just so gorgeous!
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You’re very welcome! I’m glad I can help 😀
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Hey there! I think hijabs are just plain gorgeous. So I decided to create a character who is a mermaid and wears a hijab. I’m wondering if it would be offensive to anyone if I were to draw her without a hijab occasionally to show off her fab hair.
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Hi Kyle
A hijabi mermaid?! That is the coolest thing I’ve ever heard! I would love to see this magical creation. I wished I could be a mermaid when I was a little girl. I would imagine being a mermaid that could also go out to land when I wanted to – typical little girl dreams.
Not offensive at all! In fact, it sounds like it’ll make her a little bit real. Hahaha does the mermaid wear a burquini/burkini? If you don’t know what that is, you really want to Google it!
But yeah, dude! Let’s see this mermaid!
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I absolutely love your site! Its great to read comments and replies from real women, real people. I’m a 27 year old Christian woman who covers with a bandana for biblical reasons and it works when I don’t have a hairtie. I think hijabis are very beautiful! I do get weird looks when I tell a hajabi that her hijab is gorgeous then I get a thanks with a smile. Anyone who covers for thier own sake is truly courageous. I love your response that women own their bodies and should cover their own bodies as they wish. That will always stick with me! I plan on upgrading my bandana to a longer actual scarf in the future. I’ve worn them before and I felt beautiful and very confident. The only bad experience was when I started a job and they had to triple check with corporate if it was appropriate with the dress code to wear any color or just certain color of veils. You are a beautiful person and I just love your site, how you stand up for your own heart, are courageous, as well as confident, and you are not afraid to express your mind. I love it! God bless you and all your readers! (Please do let me know if I ever offend!) Lots of love!
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Hi Rachael! I am so sorry in the delay with getting back to you! Your comment is incredibly sweet and it makes me feel fantastic to know that so many women are resonating with these ideas. There are so many discussions amongst women about how they should and shouldn’t dress. I’m a firm believer that anyone should be allowed to wear what they want (or not wear what they want!)
It’s always interesting to hear about why women choose to cover their hair or other parts of their body, and there is always a sincere thought process behind each story. Thank you so much for sharing yours.
Lots of love right back at you!
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I’m doing this social experiment at work. So long story short, everyone at my job thinks our boss is very discriminative. We were all asking “what if” questions when I brought up the question – What if wore a hijab for a couple of days or a week just as support to the culture, and to see if my boss would let me practice life with a hijab for a week.
I kind of thought about it and realized that it might me offensive to women who have to wear the hijab cause I’m basically abusing the hijab by just trying to experiment on my boss to see if he’ll treat me differently.
Would that be offensive? I don’t want to abuse the hijab but I want to raise awareness about discrimination at my job.
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Hi Serah!
It sounds like an incredibly stressful situation to be in. I can definitely see where you are coming from with your boss, and why you would want to wear a hijab to see what he would do. I don’t think there’s a problem at all with wearing a hijab for any reason, but I query if there is any benefit in setting a sort of trap for this person. It’s all well and good to say he may start treating you differently for wearing a hijab, but a man may treat a woman differently for man reasons – it could be because he doesn’t know how to deal with it or what is appropriate conduct. I don’t know – I’ll leave that up to you to decide, but I don’t think I would do that myself.
I think there are other ways to raise awareness about discrimination. It could be an active effort of logging every event of misconduct and reporting it to HR. It could be having some work functions or even training to explain what is appropriate and remind people about what isn’t appropriate.
I can see why you’ve asked if it’s offensive though! Some women might say that wearing a hijab is undermining the actual experience of hijabi women. I’ve never believed that to be the case. I think there is benefit in sharing experiences – even if it’s in shallow meals.
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Hahaha. Meals. I meant ‘means’! I must be hungry!
I hope that, regardless of what you choose to do, the situation gets better for you and your colleagues.
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can your bangs be exposed if you wear a hijab?
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Hi Emily
That one’s an interesting question and would require an Islamic jurisprudence expert to explain the answer. Some who look at the Quran only will say that the Quran requires draping of a scarf around your head so that if your bangs or part of your neck/ears etc show, it’s not a big deal. Others highlight a hadith (prophetic traditions) which says that the only thing that a woman should display to male non-relatives is her hands and face.
But yes! It’s not really a question that I can give you a definitive answer on because of the schools of thought on this. I have taken the interpretation that your bangs shouldn’t be exposed, but that’s not to say that this is the only correct answer.
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I’m not a Muslim but I wanted to try wearing a hijab. I have been wondering if wearing a hijab would be offensive to Muslims. I’ve been watching a lot of hijab tutorials on YouTube and they all look beautiful!
Thank you for this enlightening post! 🙂
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Hi Janine!
Thank you very much for your message. It seems that many, many women are interested in wearing a hijab – whether that’s for reasons of modesty or just to try it. My opinion is that there is nothing offensive about either of those options. I believe that all women have the right to dress however they please. I am honoured that you would want to try a hijab and share in my experience, even if it’s a high level experience.
I would love to know how it goes if you end up giving it a try!
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Pingback: Is it offensive for non-Muslim women to wear a hijab? | Unveiled Thought
Hi,I just recently started wearing hijab and have been trying out on different styles( I only wear shawls just because I always find it super difficult to wear the square ones but it seems the opposite for different people hehe to each their own I guess) In fact i stumbled upon your website while looking for a particular match for ‘orange tops with hijabs’. I really like your site and I think it’s amazing. Keep it up! 🙂
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Congratulations! I hope you find a style that you can comfortably settle in. It took me a while! Thank you so much for your kind words. It means a lot to know that people enjoy my posts!
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I always wondered – why do some women show a bit of their hair (like this: http://i.huffpost.com/gen/1552060/images/o-GREEN-HIJAB-facebook.jpg)? Is it a cultural thing?
Also, as a general rule (in my experience), women who wear hijab always have the most lovely coordinated outfits. My friends and I have a theory that they have so much practice matching accessories it just carries into everything else. You certainly are no exception!
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Oh, you! Aren’t you an absolute darling! Thank you!
The fringe thing is an interesting one – most often, I feel like it’s a thing that happens in countries where wearing a hijab is mandatory. That is, the women are wearing it as part of a uniform so they’re not too fussed.
In other cases, it’s just a cultural thing. Many Fijiian Muslims that I know wear a hijab with a tshirt.
I suppose we all have our own ways of expressing modesty! For some it’s a total cover up, for others it’s none, and for most it’s somewhere in between.
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Whats soo wrong with showing ur hair? I mean its hair ur not showing off ur ankle or shoulder for it to b like an offense whats the point of styling ur hair or whatever if you cant show it off and get compliments on it
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People have very different ideas of what is okay to show and what isn’t. People have very different comfort levels. When I do my hair, it’s to show it off to myself and my girlfriends – I control who gets to see it and compliment me on it.
It’s really just about personal choice 🙂
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So, if your hair is sticking out from under your hijab, am I allowed to tell you about it so you can fix it? Or do I just leave the situation alone?
(This actually happened in college. Was sitting behind a friend of mine and noticed her hair was sticking out. Internally debated if I should tell her or not before deciding to. Just a real quick “Hey *friend’s name* I just thought you should know your hair is sticking out the back of your hijab”. She thanked me and corrected it, but I still wonder if that was “allowed”.)
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Hi Hank! That’s a really sweet question to ask. Of course it’s allowed 🙂 I’m sure your friend appreciated that you pointed it out to her – I know I would!
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Hello! I’m really sorry for leaving a question on an old post, but I’m curious. If a Muslim woman who wears a hjiab is romantically and/or sexually attracted to other women, would she have to cover up around them as well, like she has to with marriageable men? Thank you for your time!
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Hi, Wren!
Don’t apologise at all. The best thing about the internet is that all the articles are sort of always going to be relevant because they’ll forever exist and remain accessible. Living pages, really 😀
In terms of your question, I’ve wondered similar things and ultimately, everything I’ve read up on and all the knowledgeable people I’ve asked about it have said the same thing – if a woman is in the presence of a woman that is attracted to women, she should cover up around her in the same way she would cover up around a male. However, it’s interesting to think about it in the reverse – if the woman covering up is sexually attracted to women, should she also be covering up… Hm. Let me do some investigating and get back to you.
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I’m also really interested in this one! I’m bisexual and have recently started wearing hijab. For me it seems silly to wear it only when I’m around men that aren’t closely related to me (pretty much everyone but my dad, since I have no brothers and extended family are on the other side of the world). That doesn’t seem to take into account the huge variety on the spectrum of gender- and sexual identities (what about gay men, lesbian/bi women, trans* men or women, people who fall elsewhere on the gender spectrum…)
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I am so sorry for the delay in this response. I have just found over 50 comments that have been marked as spam going as far back as 2015. It’s possible that I have responded to this already – but I’ll answer again in case I haven’t!
But also – I know you found me in other ways 😉
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I am so sorry for the delay in this response. I have just found over 50 comments that have been marked as spam going back to 2015. It’s possible that I have responded to this already – but I’ll answer again in case I haven’t!
Yes! I did – a religious teacher I trust told me that the Islamic ruling is about gender as opposed to sexuality. Muslim women should cover up around other men, irrespective of whether they are gay or not, and can be uncovered around women, irrespective of whether they are gay or not. The person I spoke to did say that there is an element of faith that can kick in which a woman can choose to cover up around a woman who could be sexually attracted to her. I am sure there are other people who would disagree but I think that’s a sensible answer 🙂 Hope that helps and again I apologise for the delay – it has been three years!!
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Is the hijab only for those who identify specifically as women, or could it be open to those who fall somewhere else on the gender spectrum?
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Hi Lukas 🙂 Interestingly, I’ve been asked this question before by transgender women (M to F) who identify with the hijab. They feel empowered by it. They’ve asked if it would be offensive to wear it, or if it would be a problem.
Ultimately, head coverings are not unique to Islam and if one feels comfortable wearing one they should -whether that’s someone who identifies with being male or female or everything in between. No one has a right to take away someone’s right to dress a certain way. I encourage anyone who wants to wear one to do it! I mean, at the end of the day, if people object – who cares! Head coverings aren’t purely Islamic and if we really must be pedantic, we can come up with a different name for it 😛 Let me know if you have any other questions!
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I´ve seen some muslim men wearing cloths on their heads that look very similar to hijabs, but I guess that´s part of some cultural dress?! In Saudi Arabia and such countries.
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Ah yes. It’s a very cultural thing – but so is the hijab as well in a lot of cases 🙂
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Hi! Sorry for asking a question on an older post, but I was wondering.. If someone not part of the Muslim faith wanted to wear a hijab or any type of headscarf, would it be ok to only wear it occasionally? Say one day they felt like dressing more modestly or just was in the mood to wear one, but sometimes they didn’t, is that acceptable or would that be rude or mocking?
I think hijabs are very beautiful and wanted to possibly try wearing one, but I don’t have any true reason other than it looking amazing to try it. The last thing I would want is to offend or disrespect anyone.
Also, thank you for this article, it was very interesting and helped answer some of my questions!
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Of course it is 🙂 You shouold feel in control of what you wear and when you wear it! The one thing I say to people when they want to wear a hijab is to be mindful that they are becoming the proverbial flag of Islam. Keep in mind that people will judge the faith on the basis of your actions. But other than that consideration – go for it! I would love to hear your experiences.
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I really don’t want to wear it but at the same time I have to wear it cause it’s haram not to,but my question is. Is it haram to wear it just because my parents want me to do so???
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Hi Habiba – it sounds like you have a complex range of factors affecting the way you see the hijab. I think it’s really important that you wear it because you want to. Wearing a hijab will sometimes result in people saying unkind things. When this happens, you want to be able to feel okay – to know that you’re doing something that you want. I hope that you’re able to find your own way. Let me know if you want to have a chat about all of this – it looks like there’s a lot there. Love to you.
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I love this. I’m a Christian but I think the hijab and modesty clothing look really nice. Would it be offensive if I wore a hijab or scarf to like go to the shops? Random I know!
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Not at all!! In fact, I wrote a whole post about it! See here: https://unveiledthought.com/2015/02/28/is-it-offensive-for-non-muslim-women-to-wear-a-hijab/
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Thank you so much! X
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If you were sleep on a bus and someone tapped you on your hijab to wake you up, would that be offensive?
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Not at all – I assume you’re just going to tap them on the shoulder. I’m sure they’ll thank you for it!
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So you can rock any hairstyle you want? I want to say, i thought woman ´has to have´ a long natural hair. But now i see it is just my lack of education 😀 (Btw i live in country, where people are really touchy about Muslims, esspecially these days – so i don´t know much about your ´hair coultoure´ and i don´t have much possibilities to ask :D)
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Absolutely!! My hair’s pretty oring – but my hijabi friends rock the coolest hair styles. Very modern, very on trend! Feel free to ask as many questions as you like – I’m the most not-touchy person you’ll know 😉
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I haven’t been able to determine whether it is necessary for a woman who doesn’t have any hair (that’s me) to cover her head when when visiting a Muslim country. And if if so why?
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That’s a good question. Covering your hair will depend on whether you’re in a country or part of a country where covering up is necessary.
Wearing a hijab isn’t just about covering your hair – it’s beyond that. I’m not really sure what your experiences would be in places where wearing a hijab is necessary. Please feel free to contact an embassy in your home country to see what advice that would have for you 🙂
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Maybe they would think she was a man?
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If she dressed in a unisex way I mean!
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I know this post is over a year old but can still ask a question? I was out at dinner this evening and a women in a hijab came by to ask a question at the counter we were at. When she walked away I noticed her long pony tail hanging down her back from under her scarf. My first instinct was go and to tell her, but my husband stopped me, worried that I may offend her. I have been exposed to a but of Muslim culture here in California, and my understanding is to think of it almost as if a woman’s slip was showing under her dress. I almost feel bad that I didn’t say anything, but at the same time, not being of the same culture, would it have been rude to assume she needed my help? Thanks so much!! P.s. Your blog is awesome, thank you!!
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Hi, Mogran! Thanks so much for your question. I think it’s so sweet that you considered telling this woman that her hair was hanging down – I definitely would have done that and would appreciate someone telling me. It’s definitely not an offensive thing. It’s more likely than not that she didn’t intended to have her pony tail hanging out. Your analogy is perfect – it’s the same as letting a woman know her tag is sticking out or something.
Thank you so much for your kind words! I’m so glad you enjoy the blog!! ❤
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Do you sleep with your hijab on? I am asking this because I am interested in wearing a hijab.
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Hi Jade!
I do not 🙂 In fact, most of the time I’m not wearing it at home either. I only wear it in the presence of males who I’m not related to directly (father, brother, uncle etc).
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Love it!
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I have a question. My flat mates observe the hijab and I think they’re going to be reluctant to let me bring my boyfriend over. I have my own room in the flat. How can I have my boyfriend over without insulting their religious practice? For example, if my boyfriend and I are coming in and they aren’t wearing their hijab and are sitting in the living room can I just cover my boyfriend’s eyes and bring him into my room without breaking any religious rules?
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Hi K! Sorry for the delay in responding to your question.
This is an interesting situation because I suppose there would be similar considerations to living with women in general. I think most girls would want to be forewarned if your boyfriend was coming over so that they don’t lounge around in clothes that they’re uncomfortable in.
Have you guys talked about having men over? If they had reason to believe that you would have your boyfriend visit, then it means that they have braced themselves for this possibility.
Theoretically, yes, you absolutely could cover your boyfriends eyes, or the girls could just step away while he walked through the house. It may be that they’re more comfortable staying in their rooms while he’s around. I think if it were me in the situation, I would just throw on a comfy hijab and lounge around in that.
Have a chat with them and see how they feel 🙂 Good luck!
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LOL the last question haha. I actually had few friends who wanted to see my hair lol.
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People are always so interested 😛
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Hey!
First of all, I would love to say how much I LOVE THIS! A few of these are questions I wouldn’t even think of! Love, love, love.
I am not Muslim, but have been in a relationship with a man (& family who are 😊) for over a year now. His mother is Muslim, so, as far as Islam goes, I read and try to understand/practice all I can so I am always respectful/up to par on custom.
So, Really, I just wanted to say, how grateful i am to read this and more so, if (WHEN – is more like it) you have a “Try a Hijab” day ..I’d love to be a part!!
Blessings to you!
Thank you for sharing such valuable thoughts/answers!
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Hi Vanessa!!
So many people have asked for a Try a Hijab day! I think there is enough interest that I should organise something. Set yourself up as a subscriber to the blog via your email or on the Facebook page so that you’re notified when something comes through 🙂
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So I’m a senior in high school ( i wear the hijab) and I want to be an elementary school teacher but I know that some people don’t like the hijab (I live in california) would I not be able to find a job? I’m not really sure what to expect so I’m kind of nervous
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Hi Fatama
There is a possibility that people may not be nice, but I have found overwhelmingly that while I have been working, people have been very respectful of me and my right to wear a hijab. Many people often ask me questions about Islam and the hijab and politics in the Middle East. Their questions are innocent and people just want to know things.
So I would say that mostly, there is nothing to worry about. If you do ever feel harassed as a result of wearing a hijab, there are many ways that a situation can be handled. People don’t like seeing innocent people being hurt – even if they don’t agree with your choices.
I’m always here to answer any questions about a specific situation. You will be fine, inshAllah 🙂
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There is not end to the funny questions that get asked. I’m glad you have have fun with them.
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Hello Amne! I just want to say how much I love your blog! I discovered it a few days ago through a random Google search and I’ve read a few of your articles. I love your sense of humour and I love how you’re open to questions and happy to explain anything about Islam. Your perspective and attitude is really refreshing in these times of heightened political tensions. I hope that everyone who is afraid of or hates Muslims would read your blog and realise that (above all) we are all just human beings:)
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Hi Berta
Thank you so much for your kind words!! That means a heck of a lot. There is something incredibly rewarding to know that many people can find me in their Google searches and see a different side to Islam.
It makes every negative experience I’ve ever had totally worth it.
Love to you and yours!
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If the point of wearing a hijab is to be modest the why most of you girls put so much makeup ?
I also wonder why is the usage of burka? I know in the Quran there’s a part where the most beautiful women were required to cover up in oder to avoid attention from men. But then what makes someone beautiful? Why is it that men gets to decide if I’m beautiful or not?
Also if I consider myself beautiful (physically) that’s wrong in many ways. Because looks are not important at all.
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Hi Tif
Thanks for your comment! Not every woman wears a hijab purely for modesty, and everyone’s definition of modesty will differ. Some women will wear a hijab with make up, others won’t. It really just depends on personal preference.
Women who wear a burqa will do it for many different reasons. Mostly, they do it to be in control of their own image and their own beauty – they get to decide who sees them. It is not men who force these women to wear a burqa; they choose to do it.
I don’t think there is anything wrong with people thinking that they are beautiful. In fact, I would advocate that people feel empowered by the way they look and that they look the way they want to.
I guess at the end of the day, each person should be free to look the way that they feel most comfortable 🙂
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Are you a Muslim and are you wearing a hijab from now on
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Hi, Noor!
Yes, I’m Muslim. I’ve been wearing the hijab for a very long time!
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So, I think I’ve got this straight….but it’s the covering ofthe hair that matters, not the ears? Does it matter about the neck?
Signed, friendly young Catholic woman who’s curious. 🙂
(I love your posts.)
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Hello!
It really depends on who you talk to. It’s really supposed to be everything but the hands and face, but this opinion differs.
Thanks for the love! Right back atcha! ❤
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Thanks…I’m just reading a bit of why you wear the hijab, in which you mention the debate. 🙂
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😀
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Ah, in my religion veiling with headscarves is a pretty common practice, and I’ve always loved the ideal of wearing a hijab. However, I’m a trans man (female to male) and don’t know if this would make people question my gender identity, or if it would be inappropriate. Opinion?
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Hello, dear.
Thank you for your message! I have received this question from a few different people which leads me to believe that it is probably more common than any of us realise.
I will give you the advice that I give everyone else – live your life in a way that makes you happy and comfortable. No one else is going to feel the way you do or have to process the emotions that you do. If covering your hair with fabric makes you happy – do it!
Keep in mind that some people may not like it or may be confused. It is up to you to decide how you will deal with this – but at the end of the day, other people’s negative reactions are their problem.
Just be happy ❤
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